Its not weakness, its lack of knowledge

A tragedy has happened in a family. This family has had a multitude of problems. Did it start with a young lady who left her home to escape the physical abuse from her father at the age of 14? Did this poor male role model of a father define her own single criteria for a future husband--one that doesn't hit. When this woman's husband ended up being disrespectful and unfaithful as a husband and father, what kind of role model was he? Is this why his own daughter didn't have very high expectations for who might father her own children? Is this why some young girls desperately seek love from any male?

Men who are not kind, loving, and have a work ethic do not build the self-esteem and expectations in their daughters that they deserve to be treated with respect. The two boys in the third generation of this family were loved, but lacked some important knowledge often learned from role models. Four illegitimate children are the result and their own lack of providing good fathering skills because they were never given all the tools themselves.

Probably the biggest tragedy in all this is society's attitude about being weak if you don't deal with problems well. As a result, people feel shame and won't admit they have a problem they don't know how to deal with and don't ask for help. Instead, they "buck up", which means burying your feelings and not dealing with them. This can be very dangerous. One of these two third generation young men had a very sensitive nature and probably didn't want anyone to worry about him. He didn't deal with his feelings; instead he took himself out of the equation of life entirely. He has left 2 sons without a fatherly role model at all and a nephew who he was a role model to with a vision of finding him in a horrible state that will never be erased entirely.

Not dealing well with problems is not about weakness. Its about having knowledge and tools. No one would expect you to go bake a souffle without knowledge and tools. No one should expect anyone to deal with serious problems and crisis without knowledge and tools. Lets pray that those who need help will not be ashamed and embarrassed to ask for it--from God and people. "Bucking up" is only the answer with minor disappointments and skinned knees--not serious problems and life crisis.